Time for some more truths about sleeping. Co-sleeping is wondrous for nighttime slumbers with the Little One, and as I've already mentioned, has made such a difference to our experience of nightly feeds and settling. We are still, however, experimenting with daytime napping...
I've started walking around the lake in the morning to coincide with the first nap after waking. She'll chat to herself for a while or make funny little frustrated yips before the gentle bumps work their magic. Being a morning person, starting the day with energy and purpose pleases me, and it feels refreshing to be breathing air into my body and striding out my thoughts. We will usually make it all the way around without her waking up. (I've learnt to throw a carrier in the bottom of the pram).
Mid-morning or lunchtime naps are less predictable, often shorter (20-40 minutes?) will and depend on how our day is unfolding and where we are. Snoozing happens in laps, car seats, the bouncer, on shoulders...and definitely not in bassinets/cots (Saskia's emphasis).
For the mid-afternoon nap, I'll lay down beside the Little One on our bed and can guarantee this will be a much more substantial sleep. I look forward to this time as I'll read, shut my eyes, or stare at the delicate skin of her eyelids. This is a luxury I allow myself as a mama to one, a mama who isn't working (paid work, rather).
Her before-Mama-goes-to-bed sleep? (7-10pm). That's a whole other story. No, actually it's a pretty simple one. We just spend this time resettling as she'll sleep in her bouncer in her room downstairs for 40 minute stints at most...Please help me out here fellow co-sleepers. What's the trick?
Babies and sleep can be so unpredictable!! Sophie's sleep has been improving here lately thank goodness. However, I find she sleeps best when we're at home and so our outings are timed around these a lot of the time. With Grace, she would just nap in the pram if I went out but Soph is not so accommodating :)
ReplyDeleteI can't give sleep advice because I had a little girl that wasn't a sleeper and I'm quite sure I did all the "wrong things". For a while there it shattered my confidence...she was wide awake in a cot, crying in a pram and screaming in a car! So she slept in a sling until she was too big or I would lay down with her and breastfeed to sleep until that stopped working too. From day dot she knew what she wanted (which was rarely what I had in mind!) and that was a bit tough. But those times were so beautiful as well. And I'm glad that I was more worried about a secure attachment than sleep.
ReplyDeleteIt sounds like you're doing an amazing job. And no matter what anyone says, it's only you who knows what's best for you and your sweet Saskia. x
it's true, the naps together are beautiful times (i mean, why would i be so desperate to do washing, sweep courtyards, etc if i can lay next to that sweet little one)...i think we've now accepted she's not a sleeper, but she's an expert giggler and the best snuggler x (you can't have it all!)
DeleteI don't think that there is any trick. With Alice, we "created" (actually, we just did what she wanted us to do) a routine and sticked to it (I often think that people try to change routines too quickly, anyway). It is bath, pj, goes to our bed, turn of light, dad on one side and her in the middle, I feed her for about 10 minutes, she chats to herself a bit and falls asleep.
ReplyDeleteEach baby is different so the only trick I could give you is to trust yourself. Only you know what is best for your baby. You are doing a wonderful job :)
I very much agree with what's been written above, every baby has her/his own clock and bringing this one in tune with your one can take a lot of time. I actually think you are doing super well! My little girls is a few weeks older than Saskia and still won't take her day naps anywhere else than in the sling. Our evenings play out very much like Claudia's; bath, moon song (old German tune which has the terrific line 'cold is the evening mist') while putting on pjs and preparing the bed, then it's already bed time. She's usually very tired from the bath (one of us will go in the big bath with her so she spends usually 20 minutes in there) and will be asleep in no time by 6.30, feeding only if she's hungry. We have a pacifier though which really seems to help her calm down and I frankly have doubts that we would have 'baby-free' evenings if she wouldn't sleep in our bed. I'll try your mid-afternoon co-nap strategy, perhaps she will tolerate sling-less naps if I'm in bed with her.
ReplyDeletejust read your blog and love the thought of a baby sleeping in a sling as you sew! so very sweet. hope the mid arvo co-nap strategy works for you x
DeleteWe're not co-sleeping (but in the same room) and I have a similar issue with day naps. He's great in the morning, then gets trickier and trickier to encourage to sleep as the day progresses. So he's really quite ratty by the evenings. Luckily he's great sleeping at night.
ReplyDeleteWe don't really have a routine.. apart from a bath at 5pm (ish). I breastfeed until he's pretty much alseep, I put him down, he sleeps a bit then wakes up =repeat this sequence until he goes to sleep for the night=.
The final sleep used to start at 10.30 (tedious) then 9.20 (weirdly on the dot) then 8.30ish (awesome) and the last couple of evenings has been even earlier! Allowing us to have dinner together, bliss! I have no idea how we got here, so this is of no help to you at all, apologies.
Was just re-reading this post and checking what others had suggested. I was talking to my hair dresser today whose bub is roughly Saskia's age about the frustrations of cat napping. Like Claire above, our naps get shorter as the day goes on and early evening is our rattiest time. We both agrred that while books are good for giving you an idea about newborns, ultimately you have to just make things work for you. Sophie's bedtime often is quite late, around 8 but that is what suits us for now. You're doing a wonderful job making things work for you by getting out and about in the mornings etc. I think catnapping is a common problem at this stage xx
ReplyDeletethanks for your lovely words of support and encouragement. i know it won't last forever and she really is a happy baby so she's obviously not suffering for lack of longer day naps!x
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